Today is Easter Monday and I pray that we are all filled with Easter joy. Joy is something that was really missing from my family life during those early years. Oh there were some happy times, but there is a definite difference between happy times and times filled with joy. Bob and I will be married 38 years come this May and I am forever grateful for that fateful day with that priest. We came through our "passion," referring to the paradox of Jesus' passion of suffering compared to the world's passion of sex, and arrived at new life resurrected in Christ Jesus. But every day we must make choices to either remain with Jesus, who is love itself, or be tempted by the worldly ways of self-love.
It was so many years ago that I cannot remember the details of what happened next in our marriage and family life. I do remember, however, being tempted ferociously with thoughts of going to a younger priest who would be more with the current times, or even leaving the Catholic Church and all of their strigent laws. It occurred to me, by the grace of God, that I was contemplating doing whatever necessary in order to get what I wanted. More words of that priest came to my mind at some very opportune times that made me wonder if he could be right and I could possibly be "somewhat" selfish in my thinking. So, I made the decision to at least give his counsel a try.
Resisting the temptations of the evil one paid off huge! After Jesus was tempted in the dessert for 40 days, the Father sent angels to minister to him (Matthew 4:11). As I reflect back, that is exactly what God did for me. Because I did not give in to those specific temptations, God sent His angels to minister to me. Putting forth an effort to love this person that I did not feel that I could love required more than I had within me, and I went to Jesus. It reminds me of a billboard that read, "Loved the wedding. Please invite me to the marriage." I kept Jesus at church and did not realize that our home was the domestic church and He lived right there with us. We bring Jesus to light within our homes whenever we love one another. Oh, how all of this surprised me and how shameful I felt.
The living martyr had to finally die and it was going to be painful.
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